Bad things that happen to us can leave a strong mark, affecting our feelings and thoughts for a long time. These events can show up in different ways, pointing out the scars we carry. It’s really important to recognize these signs to understand the complex nature of trauma and start working towards healing.
1. The urge to take control for creating a safety bubble
Trauma survivors often feel compelled to control their surroundings as a safety measure, which could manifest as micromanagement, extreme organization, or difficulties in task delegation.
By leveraging therapy, survivors can deal with these control issues. Cognitive-behavioural techniques and mindfulness practices can aid in gradually letting go of control, fostering internal safety.
2. Overlooking personal needs for others
Trauma can result in a pattern where one’s own needs are put aside for others. This can lead to self-care negligence, overextension, or guilt when focusing on personal well-being.
Identifying such behavioural patterns is the first stride towards healing. Techniques like self-compassion exercises, boundary creation, and assertiveness training can abet survivors in prioritizing their well-being guiltlessly.
3. A consistent feeling of suspicion and distrust in others
Trauma can diminish trust, especially if the trauma was inflicted by someone close or trustworthy. This can result in a general air of suspicion and difficulty in forming new relationships.
Recognizing and understanding the origins of this mistrust is the first step towards healing. Trust-building exercises, therapeutic interventions, and cautious exposure to trustworthy relationships can help rebuild trust.
4. Over-apologizing and a penchant for agreeability to avoid conflict
Trauma survivors tend to apologize excessively or be overly agreeable to sidestep confrontations or potential harm.
Acquiring assertiveness skills and recognizing the value of personal opinions and boundaries are instrumental steps in healing. Therapy can aid in understanding the origins and forming healthier communication patterns.
5. Fear of positive change
Trauma may instil a fear of change and an inclination towards familiarity and routine. Acceptance of new experiences and opportunities might take time and support.
Therapy can help survivors comprehend their resistance and gradually embrace positive changes. Small, manageable goals can render this process less daunting.
6. Boundary issues and guilt when enforcing them
Trauma can pose a challenge in establishing and upholding healthy boundaries leading to difficulty in saying no, guilt when setting boundaries, or blurred personal boundaries.
Learning to set boundaries involves comprehending one’s limits and communicating them lucidly. Therapy can provide strategies to enforce boundaries guiltlessly.
7. Frequent need for reassurance
Trauma survivors often seek more reassurance than others, which can stem from fear of abandonment or low self-confidence.
Cognitive-behavioural therapy (CBT) or support groups can help build self-esteem and internal validation, reducing the need for constant reassurance.
8. Struggles with self-worth
Trauma can have a detrimental effect on self-esteem, leading to feelings of worthlessness, shame, or self-blame.
Rebuilding self-worth involves challenging these negative beliefs and replacing them with positive affirmations. Therapy, self-compassion practices, and supportive relationships can foster a renewed sense of self-worth.
Trauma can really impact a person’s life, leaving emotional and mental scars. If we know the signs of trauma, we can better support those affected. Healing from trauma is a personal process and having professional support is key. With care, understanding, and the right help, people can overcome their trauma, rebuild their self-esteem, and build a better future.
