4 Tips on how to navigate the holidays when you have a dysfunctional family or Narcissistic parents
Let’s get into these 4 tips on how to navigate the holidays when you have a dysfunctional family or narcissistic parents
Do you have difficulty with a narcissistic parent? Are you having trouble feeling overwhelmed with learning how to navigate the holidays with a dysfunctional family or narcissistic parent?
I’m going to give you 4 tips on how to navigate the holidays when you have a dysfunctional family or narcissistic parents.
Holidays are a time you have to navigate the holidays because you know exactly who is going to be there. I want to provide you with the toolkit of tools that you can use to help you navigate through the holidays when you have a dysfunctional family or narcissistic parent.
Let’s be real there are some families where it is nice and beautiful moments of bliss and memories. However, if you have a dysfunctional family or narcissistic parents, the holidays can be a nightmare.
Here are 4 tips on how to navigate the holidays when you have a dysfunctional family or narcissistic parents.
If you follow these tips, you can survive the holidays even if you have a difficult family situation.
You deserve to enjoy this special time of year! Now let’s get into it.
1. Establish boundaries with your dysfunctional family members or narcissistic parents and stick to them
Establishing boundaries with your family members can be a difficult task, especially if youāre dealing with narcissistic parents or other dominant figures. It is important that you draw the line and stick to it so that you can take care of yourself and your emotional needs.
Whether it’s setting limits on how often you are available, limiting conversations that make you feel uncomfortable or demanding respect in the form of not being attacked when voicing your opinion, it is essential that you establish these boundaries and follow through with them. Now let me break this down when I mention demand there is a difference between making a request and having a demand/boundary.
Request: Can you please not ask about my love life?
Demand/Boundary: I appreciate you concern but I will not talk about my love life if anything changes I will let you know.
As hard as it may seem to stay consistent in regards to these boundaries at first, standing your ground can help shift the power balance. You teach people how to treat you through your boundaries. I talk about this deeply in my upcoming Unraveled to UnBothered Intensive Program to help you know the exact tools to heal your trauma from the narcissistic parent, and rediscover who you are so you can establish a healthy relationship with yourself and others. Sign up here.
If a family member tries to step over the boundary line, remind them of what was discussed and why it is necessary for both parties; this reinforces the boundary and shows them that their behavior will not be tolerated. With clear communication and self-assurance in knowing which boundaries not to cross, maintaining healthy relationships with family can become more possible over time.
Establishing boundaries with your family ā even narcissistic ones ā will likely require patience and persistence when it comes to this you will have to follow through; but if done correctly, it paves the path for healthier interactions going forward.
2. Don’t engage in arguments or debates with dysfunctional family members and narcissistic parents
While disagreements and debates within families are inevitable, it’s important to keep in mind that arguments can do far more harm than good.
So bottom line is I want you to be smart about choosing your battles. All arguments are is trying to prove you’re right. If you know you believe what you believe there really is no reason in feeling like you have to prove yourself.
Now this one is really going to be about knowing the narcissistic parent or relative patterns. If you know there is someone who uses feelings of guilt as their weapon of choice to get people to do what they want. It’s going to be about not playing into it. What they want is an emotional response
Before getting into a lengthy discussion with a family member, consider the risks of saying something that will get you feeling frustrated in the long run. If you know they’re not usually the type to sit down and understand you know that their people out there that will.
Not only could it cause irreparable damage to your relationship, but it could also further fuel narcissistic tendencies in certain family members. It is better to take a step back and think objectively about how to really reach a resolution.
Listening attentively and using respectful language can go a long way toward fostering understanding and the development of empathy between family members. I talk about this further into my program how to handle whether you decide to be a part of an unhealthy relationship or what to do if you want to be out of it.
In the end, learning how to express yourself in healthy ways and listening to other perspectives is an essential part of navigating any family dynamicāeven if conversations don’t always come easily. If you find yourself getting offended or getting to the point of frusturation take your break. Get a glass of water or say i need to go to the bathroom to gather how youre feeling so you can respond accordingly. Listening doesn’t mean you have to agree but if the person has a different opinion let it be just someone else’s opinion and perspective. Let them leave their life how they choose and you get to decide whether you want to be around it or not.
Both our physical and mental health will thank us for it in the long run!
3. Keep your cool with the narcissistic parents and remain calm throughout the holiday season
The holiday season can often be a difficult time of year, especially when learning how to navigate the holidays if narcissistic parents are in the picture.
While it may feel like you have no control over this dynamic or how it makes you feel, it is important to remember that there are several practices and strategies you can use to keep your cool and remain calm during these times. The most important thing is to take care of yourself first before engaging with narcissistic behavior. To start, create healthy boundaries for yourself.
Respectful communication should still be the focus but set clear expectations on what you are prepared and willing to do for narcissistic parents. Secondly, practice self-care by taking time for yourself to do enjoyable activities that make you smile.
With a combination of self-compassion, healthy boundaries and enjoyment of traditions, you will be able to enjoy the positive aspects of the holiday season while maintaining your inner peace. Keeping your cool during this often stressful time empowers both yourself and those around you!
And know if it gets too much you are more than welcome to cut the time short with the narcissistic parents
So let go of what was expected in the past and know that resilience in uncertain times starts with finding inner balance within yourself. Itās simple: stay away from gossiping about narcissistic parents as much as possible; put some physical distance between you two; honor your own needs above all else; accept reality; be mindful of stress caused by narcissistic behaviors; channel kindness; stay presentā¦it all adds up!
Become more mindful about how you manage narcissistic behavior this holiday season so that each day is filled with laughter, relaxation and joy! Wishing everyone a safe and happy holiday season!
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4. Seek support from friends or other loved ones during this time
Everyone experiences tough times – especially during periods of change and uncertainty. When facing such challenges, having a supportive and understanding group of people who care about you can make the difference between getting through the storm or feeling overwhelmed.
This is perhaps even more true for those with narcissistic parents: when familiar sources of comfort are unavailable, it can be encouraging to seek out friends or other loved ones who can offer empathy and perspective on your situation.
Emotional support from relationships outside of the narcissistic home can help to build resilience, restore hope, and bring clarity that promises a brighter future. Recognizing narcissistic manipulation enables you to prioritize yourself and break free from unhealthy patterns.
As difficult as it may seem at first, taking the time to build authentic relationships with people who care is an invaluable step towards liberating yourself from the damage of narcissistic abuse. Seek out comforting arms that offer compassion, encouragement and stability – this act alone will lay the foundation for growth and healing. With courage, trust in yourself, and input from those closest to you, weathering any storm will become much easier every day.
The holiday season is a time for family, friends, and loved ones. But it can also be a time of stress and anxiety. If you have a narcissistic parent, you may be dreading the thought of spending any time with them. Establishing boundaries with your family members is a crucial step in reclaiming your peace during this holiday season. By setting boundaries, you are telling your family members that you will not tolerate certain behavior. This will help to prevent arguments and debates from happening. It’s important to keep your cool and remain calm throughout the holiday season. Seek support from friends or other loved ones if you need it. And remember, you can always sign up for my signature program, Unraveled to UnBothered Program 2023. Email me at admin@movingbeyondyou.org for a consultation call for details or make sure to get on our waitlist. Next group Jan 12, 2023